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Girl Code

MEERO
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​I always had an internal “code” that I lived by from a very young age, and didn’t think was up for discussion, or the fact that it even exists. You know, in the same way we need water. Yes, I very much thought every girl has this code, until I met plenty of those who don’t. Girls can have such a deep, complex bond that a man could never understand or could even remotely imagine what it means to have your ride or die girlfriend, so before I start bashing those who didn’t have one, let me just start by listing what a “girl code” is to me: ​ Here are some principles of girl code to me, and in my book, I truly hope ya’ll relate to it one way or another, and if none apply, girrrrrrl, you need to check your moral compass like real hard. ​ 1- My girlfriend’s man is a genderless to me, and I do NOT see him as anything else, and if he breaks a boundary, my job is to remind him who he is and his place. ​ 2- The things I know about my girlfriend are for me and for me alone; no man ( No one) on ...
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Friendship is a Verb

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In times when people are leaning more into AI as friends than onto their real, true loved ones, I can't help but feel a lot of anxiety and confusion. Friendship is something I have always valued and held in high regard, and being in my 4th decade of past, present, and future friendships, I am more confused than I was when I was a kid. I remember making and keeping friends was so easy and fun. What happens when we become adults? How do we define friendship? Let's start there, because as of 2025, I have not met two people who agree on the definition, and even if they do agree in words, they rarely do so in practice. In my eyes, a friend is a chosen, handpicked family member, and by putting them in the family member zone, I mean they are for life, with their good, bad, and ugly.  Despite the tendency to cut people off so easily in modern times, I disagree with the masses, as usual. A friend is someone whose soul makes your soul feel calm around them, someone you can tell your dark...
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Location: New York, NY, USA
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Afloat

MEERO
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I am just staying afloat; I'm neither feeling good nor bad.  I lack the simplest motivation to remain in this world or leave. All I am capable of doing right now is staying afloat.  Helpless is another feeling I have; realizing that I am a powerless creature makes me wonder if it's crazy to put in any effort in anything in life.  I've watched many friends and acquaintances get into that state (The state of not doing). And I could never grasp this concept, well, until now.  It stems from my naive belief that I can achieve anything.  However, realizing that the outcome isn't up to me was such a humbling truth. I've been reflecting recently on all my past mini projects and experiments, and the results, in most cases, fell short of what I had hoped for. I don't mean that all outcomes were bad, but I had no control over any of them, and they never really matched my vision. It's been me who just hung the results on my own doing (I put too much pressure on myself)...
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Embracing the Unfamiliar Self

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Nothing is familiar anymore! When I look around, metaphorically or physically, nothing is familiar anymore. My city doesn't look like my city, and my countries (yes, both my countries) don't look the same anymore! I'm not trying to get political this time, even though I always believed politics is in everything, including the oxygen you breathe. But I am talking about this very safe feeling of "familiarity" that I didn't think you could lose! One day, I woke up and saw everything in a different light. I'm not exaggerating. Everything I used to be,  like, have, own, feel, think, see, and/or hear is all different. And, of course, my first thought is that I'm naturally losing my mind or I am going through my mid-life crisis! I'm not sure why they call it a crisis if going through it is making me love wearing color for the first time in my life! It could also be an overcompensation for my low physical energy! I don't know why, though, they called i...
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Gen Z’s Vision: A World Without Borders or Labels

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  I actually remember being a teen in the late '90s and having a similar thought—not the genderless part, but the idea of living without borders. Just going from one place to another, no restrictions, no governments, just pure freedom. Back then, I thought that’s what freedom meant—no laws, no control, just people running wild and doing whatever they wanted. It sounded nice. But now? Looking at the world as it is, I can’t help but think... letting this species run wild and free with no rules or identity? Yeah, I can already picture the Netflix horror movie. Freedom has always been my ultimate goal. Ever since I was a kid, I just wanted to do whatever I wanted, whenever I pleased. Maybe that constant craving for freedom shaped my decisions as a young adult. And even now, as a middle-aged woman, I can still say freedom is at the core of how I live. But my definition of it? That has changed drastically over the years. I’m not sure if it has come full circle yet, but it feels close. No...
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Leading with Love: Balancing Leadership and Control.

MEERO
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  Understanding the difference between being a   leader   and a   dictator   is crucial in relationships, especially for male partners. Knowing where the line is can make a huge difference in how happy and healthy your relationship is. What Does Leadership Look Like in a Relationship? Being a leader in a relationship doesn't mean being bossy or controlling. It's about guiding and supporting each other. Here's what a good leader looks like: Empathy and Understanding : A great leader listens to their partner and tries to understand their feelings and needs. It's all about showing empathy and care. Effective Communication : Leaders talk openly and honestly. They share their thoughts and feelings and encourage their partner to do the same, creating a trusting and open environment. Support and Encouragement : Being a leader means cheering your partner on, celebrating their wins, and supporting them through tough times. Shared Decision-Making : A leader values and inc...
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Too late or just on time?" Enjoy the ride!

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  Life continues to teach me things every second if you look at things as deeply as I do.  One of the most annoying things (for me) is that things never happen when I expect them or need them the most ... and then I realize that they happen as soon as I give up.  Was this a coincidence or a pattern?  It was a pattern that kept happening repeatedly; for example, the job you wanted so badly only came when you gave up searching, so the joy of getting the job hits you differently!!  Imagine if we received everything we wanted and needed instantly!! I don't think my tiny brain can even imagine that! I would totally have a heart attack (Always dramatic) But the deep thinker that I am, I started watching the pattern, trying to understand why! I always like to ask why! because nothing is a coincidence... Everything's been calculated and couldn't or shouldn't be any other way, but I can't help but wonder! The appreciation that comes too late is useless, or that's what it...
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The caregiver" love the bond.

MEERO
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  Hospitals are a major part of our lives, you’re born in one and that is if you’re lucky, it’s where we all go for emergencies, surgeries, having babies and many more other reasons that are health and safety related.  It’s such a sad and a dull place to be at (Patient or Visitor) but it’s inevitable … my luck with hospitals so far had been not the best, I’ve watched my mom going to the hospital every 3 weeks for 3 years we had to go for a different damage in a different organ … we went through Breast & uterus Cancer, liver damage, Hep C, kidney failure, arriving at the end at liver failure then followed by mom gone to a better place (I truly believe in a much better place saved for the ones god chooses to save, and yes I believe in god … I know God and believing is not trending nowadays, but I am old fashion that way lol)  This post is for the caregivers, I know exactly what you’re going through and I understand your pain but let me tell you something you probably he...
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Turning red flags, green.

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  At the beginning of relationships, a lot of people turn those very obvious vibrant red flags into green flags instead and then tend to blame others for becoming something else later, which can also be true in a lot of cases. Still, many of us are guilty of changing the incredible, authentic, genuine red flag to a lovely green shade that suits our need for something. Whether it is a need for companionship and love or the fear of loneliness, we allow reality to bend otherwise at any other time when we didn't have those needs or fears we could have accepted. You start convincing yourself that the flaws could be a true advantage… and that is a change of mindset, but with that comes denying reality, which is a horrifying thought. Is your need for belonging and love making you twist and bend reality to fit that mold you built in your imagination to feed this need by keeping people around you that you shouldn't be keeping? There's no 100% correct answer; everything can be 50/50,...
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LEARNING TO SIT WITH MY EMOTIONS.

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  For the longest time, I always ran away from any negative emotions. I could never sit with any sadness, grief, or any sort of unhappiness. I usually find a distraction or two or even ten to escape these nasty feelings. I love to laugh, and it's healthy to have fun, laugh, and enjoy life, But only when you are genuinely content. I grew up to be very anxious about not being liked, misunderstood, or rejected, and never in my life had I decided to sit with these emotions until recently.  I had always practiced running away from feeling sad, and boy, Am I so good at creating the distraction I need most of the time.  But recently, I decided to stop resisting the anxiety, sadness, and or loneliness and learn to practice sitting with these emotions until I understand where it is coming from and why and how I can fix the root cause of this emotion (obviously down the road) otherwise it would be another way to escape feeling the feelings.   It is not an easy process, but it'...
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The Weight of Shame in the Journey of Abuse Survivors

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Isn’t it strange how those who endure abuse are often the ones who feel the weight of shame, while their abusers remain free of it? This misplaced guilt becomes a heavy burden, and, for many, it’s a powerful reason for staying silent or even staying bound to their abusers. The fear of judgment, exposure, and the harshness of society can make the idea of leaving feel like an impossible choice. But here’s what I want every survivor to know: shame doesn’t belong to you. It was never yours to carry. Many survivors find themselves putting on brave faces, even when the inside tells a different story. Outwardly, they might laugh loudly, exude confidence, and put on a happy front to hide their pain. Why? Because silence can be overwhelming. In that quiet space, shame has a way of creeping in, whispering the lie that the abuse was somehow their fault. But let me say this clearly:  You are not a victim. You are a survivor.  Seeing ourselves as survivors, not victims, helps reclaim the p...
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Getting to know me has been a blast … so far!

MEERO
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For the last two years since my second divorce, I've been getting to know myself—truly spending days, mornings, nights, months, and almost two years getting to know myself! At 42 and 10 months … I can actually answer the stupidest question on earth, which is, "So, um, what can you tell me about yourself?" That follows with the sleaziest smile—ugh!  I am passionate and loud, have a fantastic laugh and charming smile, and am a beautiful woman. I am kind, generous, super anxious, intimidating (I'm still not sure how, when I am only 4" 9" and weigh about 105 lb), extremely sensitive, and seriously highly empathetic that it actually physically hurts depending on the situation. The point from all this self-ego stroking is that I am so darn amazing, no, no, that's my ADHD talking  (self-diagnosis) … anyways no, the point of this rant is that How on earth did I let myself go for a whole 40 years without genuinely auditing myself, my life, my people … I always wa...
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