The Weight of Shame in the Journey of Abuse Survivors

By MEERO

Isn’t it strange how those who endure abuse are often the ones who feel the weight of shame, while their abusers remain free of it? This misplaced guilt becomes a heavy burden, and, for many, it’s a powerful reason for staying silent or even staying bound to their abusers. The fear of judgment, exposure, and the harshness of society can make the idea of leaving feel like an impossible choice.

But here’s what I want every survivor to know: shame doesn’t belong to you. It was never yours to carry.

Many survivors find themselves putting on brave faces, even when the inside tells a different story. Outwardly, they might laugh loudly, exude confidence, and put on a happy front to hide their pain. Why? Because silence can be overwhelming. In that quiet space, shame has a way of creeping in, whispering the lie that the abuse was somehow their fault.

But let me say this clearly: You are not a victim. You are a survivor. Seeing ourselves as survivors, not victims, helps reclaim the power that abuse tries to take from us. Because, in truth, abusers seek control; they thrive on holding power over others. And while they might carry their own scars, that’s not yours to bear. Recognizing yourself as a survivor means understanding that your story continues—stronger, freer, and wholly yours.

If you’ve managed to leave an abusive situation, know this: you are a hero. Saving yourself is not just an act of survival; it’s an act of courage and self-respect. The shame you feel is a remnant of the trauma, not a reflection of you. Allow yourself to break it down, to see it for what it is, and to let it go piece by piece. This process may take time but remember you’re not alone on this journey.

Leaving an abusive relationship is a step toward reclaiming your peace. While shame may try to follow, you don’t have to let it define you. Look at it with clear eyes and say, “You don’t own me.” Over time, as you learn to love and accept yourself fully, that shame will fade. It will lose its power because you’re no longer fighting it; you’re healing it.

This journey is about more than survival—it’s about breaking cycles and starting new beginnings. You’re here, and you’re strong enough to make this choice. In this process of healing, you will not only find peace but also the power to live fully.


Love & peace,


Meero

An Egyptian-American woman who spent the last two decades in New York’s fashion industry is now embracing a new chapter in her life. With a fresh perspective and a deep sense of purpose, she is transitioning to a career as a life coach. Her journey through personal and professional challenges has led her to realize that her true calling lies in helping and serving others. By guiding people through their struggles, she aims to make a meaningful impact on the world—something she found lacking in the fashion industry.

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