Friendship is a Verb

In times when people are leaning more into AI as friends than onto their real, true loved ones, I can't help but feel a lot of anxiety and confusion.

Friendship is something I have always valued and held in high regard, and being in my 4th decade of past, present, and future friendships, I am more confused than I was when I was a kid.

I remember making and keeping friends was so easy and fun. What happens when we become adults?

How do we define friendship? Let's start there, because as of 2025, I have not met two people who agree on the definition, and even if they do agree in words, they rarely do so in practice.

In my eyes, a friend is a chosen, handpicked family member, and by putting them in the family member zone, I mean they are for life, with their good, bad, and ugly. 

Despite the tendency to cut people off so easily in modern times, I disagree with the masses, as usual.

A friend is someone whose soul makes your soul feel calm around them, someone you can tell your darkest, deepest thoughts to, and they won't be shaken, because they also have dark, deep thoughts and understand what it is to be human.

You invest in your friends like you invest in your partners and family, you be there for them when needed, you give one another the unconditional support that you can't get from others, a friend is someone you lean on with your eyes closed knowing that they will be there to catch you and be there until you pick yourself up again when you are ready, a friend is someone as crazy as you are, someone who you can laugh and cry with, in this day and age when men and women are in an existence war, we must surround ourselves with good friends who show up and stay consistent. 

If the friendship doesn't feel easy, then you must question whether this is a "true" friendship. One must answer these questions so frankly and not lie to oneself; otherwise, it's really self-betrayal, and what kind of life is that, to spend lying to yourself so you are NOT alone. 

Life taught me that only the fortunate ones have such a connection from a young age that has lasted a lifetime. That is a lucky number in life; not everyone gets to count in their blessings.

But life also taught me that most of us are stages and phases in each other's lives, and that's ok only as long as we learn from everyone that comes in our lives and from those mistakes we made with them and not to repeat with the next great friend we meet, as long as we give ourselves and others grace and let them go with their flaws, secrets, and darkest times in a deeply buried in a place called the "past" that I usually don't like to visit often.

Friendship is also a verb, like love; you have to act as a friend to be a friend, and for those out there who find it hard to make friends, I would say start with those already in your life and see them through a friend's eye, stay curious about them, and practice friendship with those around you first.

Your circle will grow, and your skills as a friend will be practiced even more. Let me tell you that is how we all grow and learn. We try something for the very first time, and bit by bit, we roll with it, and that's how we become pros.

Love & Peace

Meero